


the sun rose in your eyes.

by sutherlins



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Blowjobs, Dom/sub Undertones, M/M, Mild references to PTSD, Samsteve - Freeform, Wax Play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-21
Updated: 2016-09-21
Packaged: 2018-08-16 10:01:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8097847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sutherlins/pseuds/sutherlins
Summary: After the events of civil war, Steve and Sam return to the US, moving from state to state in an effort to remain as under the radar as possible. The events of the past few months catch up with Sam and Steve tries to make things a little better.





	

There was little Steve could do to help while Sam fought for breath in the passenger seat. He had woken silently, but with a haunted look in his eyes that Steve recognised well. He started to slow down, the old car chugging as it veered off, pulling over to the side of the road. Sam waved him on before he could stop fully. Knowing there wasn’t much he could do for him at the moment, Steve reached out, his steady hand wrapping around Sam’s shaking one. He rubbed small circles with his thumb in an effort to soothe him. It wasn’t much but he hoped the small amount of comfort he provided would be enough. Twenty minutes passed before Sam gave his fingers a squeeze, managing a small smile when their eyes locked for a brief second.

"We should stop soon. Eat. Rest up." Sam spoke, his voice quieter than usual but otherwise he seemed fine. 

They’d been driving for eighteen hours. Sam had driven the first seven before they pulled over and switched seats. Driving for so long had left them feeling slightly out of time, forced them deeper into their bubble where it seemed only the two of them existed. The winter months didn’t help, making it darker than they expected for five o’clock, but Sam was right, they needed to stop. Steve gave a nod of agreement, and a motel about fifty miles out would be their destination for the night. With a glance around at the deserted road he pressed down harder on the accelerator, trees blurring as they sped closer to their new target.

Less than half an hour later and they passed a worn sign for a motel and followed the directions. Steve turned off the road and the car bounced around as it moved from the smooth road onto the rocky path. Branches from trees occasionally smacked the windows and the rain lashed down so hard on the windows that even Steve struggled to see properly. There were no lights on the road and they slowed to a crawl, moving along with only the headlights to guide them. After travelling a mile along the battered path, they fell into a small dip in the road, and a building appeared in front of them. It’s flickering pink vacancy sign glowed in the window just like so many other stops on their travels. Pulling around the compound, they saw a series of buildings taking up the small courtyard. 

Both of them were alert despite the hours of travel. The total isolation of the motel could be a good thing, but both of them were aware that they needed to make sure the place was secure before they could settle for the night. Sam slipped on his baseball cap first, pulling it down further on his head, as though that and the extra facial hair would shield their identities. Sam’s face was less recognisable, so he checked in while Steve scoped the place out. Their usual routine.

“Two buildings, one has a laundromat, a store, and a diner. The other building is the suites, plenty of exits. I think we’re good.” Steve said, carrying their bags from the car towards where Sam stood outside the reception area. 

They dumped their bags, and after a brief check of the room, headed to the diner. An aging woman with grey hair and a smoker's mouth gave them a smile when the door opened, telling them to find a seat and she’d be right with them. The smell of grease in the air didn’t deter them, actually does the opposite, and they take the booth furthest from the door, passing the few other patrons who barely give them a second glance. 

Copious amounts of pancakes, bacon, and eggs soon covered their table and they both ate in silence, throwing back the food as though they didn’t know where their next meal would be coming from. Sam stopped eating first, pushing away his plate, laughing when Steve pulled it towards him with his fork and inhaled the rest of the food.

“You feeling any better?” Steve asked, mouth full, a little bit of egg sticking to his stubble.

“No.” There was no point in lying. Steve would know. They could read each other too well at this point. “But it’s okay.”

“You wanna talk about it?” ‘It’ being the nightmare he had obviously had back in the car.

“Falling again, everyone was falling.” He paused, wiped the egg from Steve's mouth and then looked away, the intensity of his stare too much. “Riley, Rhodey, You, Bucky, Nat, even that fucking kid in the red leotard. Couldn’t get to anyone, I’d grab hold and you’d all slip through my fingers. My wings were locked, kept me frozen so there was nothing I could do, you know? Just had to watch as you all fell.” Sam felt a hand wrap around his knee, and he glanced back at Steve. His eyebrows were furrowed together, worried. It was enough to encourage Sam to keep talking. “Then my wings were ripped off, watched them fall before I started spinning too. Woke up before I hit the ground.” 

Steve was determined to make Sam forget about everything. About the raft, being on the run, about every single thing that had ever hurt him. 

“Let’s get us some clean clothes, make us feel human again, huh?”

Sam answered by fishing out the money for the food and leaving it on the table. 

Around an hour later, they returned to their room. Steve pushed Sam in the direction of the bathroom while he dug out underwear for them both. Throwing the bags of fresh laundry onto the bed, he quickly stripped out of his jeans and t-shirt, leaving them where they fell. He silently moved through the small suite and into the bathroom. With peach tiles, a fluorescent strip light, and taps that dripped, it wasn’t exactly a luxury suite. It was still one of the better places they had stopped at. The shower seemed to work fine though and Steve could make out Sam’s frame through the frosted glass, the steam fogging the mirror.

Sam didn’t react when Steve slid the glass door open, slipping inside and closing it behind him. He gave no more of a reaction than a contented sigh when Steve wrapped his arms around his waist, stroking his hands up and down his stomach. They hadn’t had a chance to work out lately, but being on the run had increased muscle definition and dropped any excess fat and Steve could feel the strong muscles of Sam’s abs contract and pull under his touch.

Steve wordlessly took the soapy loofa from Sam’s hands and started to rub small circles over his smooth skin. Loosening his hold on Sam’s waist he started working the soap into the tight muscles over his shoulders. Pressing hard into the knotted muscles, feeling his body relax further with each caress. Time passed, the water grew slightly cold and Sam reached forward cutting off the stream of water. He turned in place, wrapping his arms up Steve’s back, grabbing on like an anchor.

“I’m sorry. For this. I’m-“ Sam started, his words mumbled into Steve’s wet shoulder.

“It’s okay. What do you need?”

“I need…” He started but he wasn’t sure what he needed. He needed security. He needed routine, to get his life in balance. He needed to know where home was and feel grounded. 

That was impossible. 

Steve held him tighter while he fought with his head, trying to work out amongst the swirl of emotions what he needed at that moment. Steve seemed to know, and held him so tight he felt more rooted and at home that he ever had back in DC. He felt secure, and sure that things would be okay even if they were awful right now. “I need you.”

“Well, I’m not going anywhere.” As if to prove his point, Steve joined hands before pulling away, making sure they never lost contact. He led Sam from the shower, picking up a towel and wrapping it around Sam, kissing him on the forehead and smiling when Sam’s face finally broke into a smile too. “I’m sorry, Sam. For everything I’ve done to your life.”

“You’re worth it, Steve.”

Steve couldn’t hold back any longer. He had to show Sam just how much he meant to him. He moved closer, taking Sam’s bottom lip between his teeth, pausing and breathing in the moment, before letting go. He moved his mouth along Sam’s jaw, mumbling words of love between nips at the skin.

His hands started to explore along the tiniest of hairs that painted a canvas across his lower stomach, and Steve wanted to follow each line and curve of Sam’s body and understand the beauty behind it. He wanted to make Sam pose for him while he tried to preserve the work of art in front of him. Steve was the one who filled canvases with fantastic beauty but Sam wasn't a blank slate waiting to be filled, he was the one that packed Steve’s new world with splendour and delight, and Steve never wanted to let him go. 

Sam could see the love in Steve’s eyes but still felt like his heart was swollen in his chest. Everything was wrong. Despite Steve's gentle touch, it still wasn’t right. The lights were too bright and floors too hard and there was too much humidity and not enough fresh air.

The sensory overload was too much and it felt like it was killing him. 

“What can I do?” The question was simple, the answer anything but. How could Sam explain that everything was too overwhelming, too loud, too bright... too much. He needed to stop his mind racing, to focus, he needed-

“I need everything to stop, just for a little bit.” He turned his head into Steve's solid chest and rest against him, breathing in the smell of Steve, letting it center him. 

“Okay.” Steve said, because he knew there wasn’t much else he could do. Just sit there and wait for it to pass, just hold Sam until he’s the one in control again, not the memories that were trying to drag him under.

“Do you think-?” He shook his head. “Nevermind.” Sam's all over the place and Steve nudged him forward until they were both sitting up and he could look Sam in the eyes.

“No, what is it?”

“It doesn't matter.” He avoided eye contact, staring instead at the wall behind Steve.

“Sam, if it can help, I'll do it. Whatever it is.”

“Blindfold me?” The time they had done it before had threatened a panic attack at first until Sam gave himself over to Steve. Feeling like everything was out of his control was what normally panicked him, but relinquishing that control willingly? Letting Steve be the one to control everything? That helped. 

He needed that again. 

Steve blinked a little in surprise, a small smile telling Sam he knew what he needed, and why.

“I think I have an even better idea, but only if you're sure. We can stop whenever you want.”

“I know.” 

“You sure you're okay to do something like this?” Steve held him while he waited on the answer.

“I need to focus on you, nothing else, just, make me forget everything except us two?”

“Dry off, I'll be back in ten minutes.”

He was back in less than five.

Carrying a paper bag from the store, he dropped it onto the bed, bringing Sam into another kiss. Gentle hands held his head in place while Steve joined their lips once more. Sam melted into his touch, letting Steve control the kiss, moaning into his mouth when Steve started to knead at his ass. Sam was still naked from the shower save for the towel wrapped around his hips, and he pulled at Steve’s top in an effort to strip him down. 

Steve pulled away and Sam moved to sit on the bed, but Steve grabbed him before he could, pointing at the small table instead. 

“Lie on the table,” Steve said, voice tough, commanding, and making Sam weak in the knees. Without question he moved over, shaking the tabletop a little to test its strength, and once he was sure it would hold his weight, he fell back. 

The table was short. Sam’s head fell off the back the table and his legs dangled off the opposite side. He still had the towel wrapped around his waist while he shimmied over, finding a comfortable angle to tilt his head at. He watched Steve watch him. His eyes never left Sam’s until Sam finally let go, closing his own eyes and giving himself over to Steve and whatever filthy ideas he had.

Nothing happened at first. 

Sam felt fidgety while he tried to imagine where in the room Steve was. He jumped slightly, but kept quiet when a silk scarf was draped over his eyes, tied in a tight knot at the back of his head. No light seeped through and he was plunged into total darkness. The sensation was exactly what he needed. To cut off some of his senses for a little bit and let Steve take over. 

Sam flexed his wrists in anticipation of being bound, instead he felt Steve's long fingers wrap around them. 

“Not tonight.” Sam nodded, already feeling like he was floating just from the blindfold and Steve’s touch. It went quiet again, and now blind, Sam focused instead on the sounds around him. 

Steve must have kicked off his shoes, because Sam could hear the soft sound of barefeet moving around the table and over to the bed. He listened as the paper bag was lifted, rustling a little as Steve dug around for whatever treats, or tricks, he had purchased. 

Then he heard it. The sound that told Sam exactly what they were going to be doing that night.

He heard the strike of a match against the coarse surface of the box and the small crackle as it lit. He knew instantly what they were about to do, given that he’d mentioned it to Steve months before. He only wished his dick hadn't given away how excited he was at the idea of it.

Steve gave a small laugh, before blowing onto the bulge of Sam’s hardening dick through the towel.

“Good idea then? I was a little worried I wasn’t reading the situation correct.”

“Nah, great idea.” Sam breathed out, “Best idea you’ve had in awhile.”

“Good to know,” Steve whispered in his left ear. Sam jumped a little and called him a shit. The match had distracted him and he’d lost track of Steve's movements. His ‘insubordinate behaviour’ only gained a laugh and a faux telling off so Sam decided to let go of even trying to track Steve's movements. He let his head fall further back, relaxing his body from his toes up to shoulders.

And then he waited.

The towel was pulled out from around him first, leaving him naked and on display. He wasn’t bound, could have moved to hide himself at any moment, but it was nothing that Steve hadn’t seen already. He also knew if he moved, Steve would make him wait even longer, and he was desperate to get started. 

The first splash of molten wax hit his left nipple. The liquid fell from a considerable height, and the burning wax hardened almost instantly. The process was so quick he hadn’t even gasped out in shock before Steve was already moving across the other side of his chest, the wax dripping down and sealing his hard nipple underneath. 

Chest heaving, he waited. The only sound he heard was his own breathing, panting like he’d been running, and he fought to settle down. He focused on his breaths - in, and out. Repeat. Sam didn’t need to think about anything else. He knew there was no point guessing where it would fall next. No point trying to hear Steve's footsteps since he was being stealthy now and he’d never be able to guess. 

Breathe in, breathe out. The two pools of wax were hard now, but still warm, the skin below still hot, like standing in the sun. Sam wasn’t sure if the sensation of the wax falling was pain or pleasure, he just knew it felt good, and that he wanted more.

As though he could read his mind, Steve dripped the wax across his chest, zig zagging the candle so it fell in thin strips that hardened instantly. There was no break this time. Steve must have had two candles in his hands, because the wax never stopped falling, just jumping from side to side, his chest down to his stomach covered completely in hardened wax. 

Sam didn’t realise he was thrusting his hips off the table until the wax stopped falling and Steve’s firm hands held him down. 

“You want me to cover that pretty dick of yours in wax?” Steve asked, his voice taunting, husky, and hotter than the candles burning his skin. Sam started to speak, yes, no, he isn’t sure. The thought of Steve covering every inch of him in candlewax had him fighting against Steve's strong grip, looking for friction regardless of what his brain was saying. He considered saying yes, begging for it if he had to, but he didn’t get a chance. 

“Not tonight, I have a better idea than that.” That's all the warning Sam got before Steve’s mouth was around his dick, swallowing him down in one motion. 

It all became too much again, but not in the way it was before. This may have been too much but he wanted this to overwhelm him. He wanted to live in Steve’s wet mouth. He realised he was begging Steve to move, a solid hand gripping at his hips the only thing stopping him from thrusting up, but Steve remained motionless around his dick, only his tongue moving. Sam’s pleading words were stolen from his mouth and turned into a gasp when more hot wax rained down on his abdomen, pooling in his navel and turning solid quickly. Steve must have moved his hand closer to the skin before pulling back, because the wax went between a soothing burn and a scalding pour. Sam wanted more of each. 

Steve started to move in time with the wax, pulling his lips tight around Sam’s dick and moaning around him. Steve’s released the grip on his hips and Sam heard what he hoped was an extinguished candle hitting the floor, although the truth is he’d have let flames consume them so long as Steve kept moaning in the obscene way he was.

The way Steve’s tongue moved around the tip of his erection made Sam feel like every muscle in his body was being shocked into holding tight and rigid. Steve stopped for a second, pulling out the tell Sam to reach up and take off the blindfold. Sam did as he was told, watching as Steve’s lips wrapped back around his dick. Sam got his first look at his body, covered in candlewax of different colours. He looked like a Jackson Pollock painting. The floor was covered in the remnants of large paraffin emergency candles and stubs of multi colored birthday candles. 

The colours swirled in a beautiful pattern but Sam couldn’t focus on it for long - Steve had him too worked up. Sam thrust up, fucking Steve’s mouth, moaning out, almost sobbing because it was so much. Steve picked up his pace and Sam fucked into his mouth like he was scared to lose contact, and together they tipped him over the edge. The blindfold was gone but Sam’s vision was lost for a moment anyway, the blinding orgasm powerful and shattering. It wrecked him, draining him of all energy. He came hard, hitting the back of Steve’s throat, his hips falling hard against the table and his head lolling back. Large gasps shook him as he fought to get his breath back.

Steve was by his side, kissing his neck while his breathing returned to normal. He’d have a few normal breaths, followed by a shaky exhale and a whisper of Steve’s name. Sam wasn’t sure how much time passed but he eventually felt Steve pull him up, leading him over to the sofa. Steve was naked now too and Sam felt safe with his back against Steve’s stomach, his head tipped back on Steve's shoulder.

Sam didn’t question when a blade appeared beside him, Steve sliding it beneath the wax, gliding it down and letting the wax fall off in large strips. His skin was still hot, the cold of the blade soothing him and he watched with interest as they made a mess of the floor that would be difficult to explain to the maid. 

“They tried to sell me scented candles.” Steve laughed, flicking another piece of wax off the blade of his knife. “Had to tell them I’d have a migraine with them, didn’t want to explain I planned on covering you in them.” Sam smiled, and brought his hand up to rub the back of Steve’s head, listening to him talk. “We should probably shower again.”

“Yeah, maybe I can say thank you while we are in there.”

“There's no need to say thank you,” Steve promised, biting at Sam’s ear, “but I won’t say no to such a generous offer.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to [hermionesmydawg](http://archiveofourown.org/users/hermionesmydawg/pseuds/hermionesmydawg/) for attempting to fix my shit.
> 
> Thanks for reading, [come say hi over on tumblr :)](http://sutherlins.tumblr.com/)


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